It’s white gold; it’s full of diamonds; and it fits me, and my personality, perfectly. It graces my left hand every day. And it represents more than words can ever say. You probably already know exactly what I’m describing – yes, it’s my wedding ring.
My engagement band, in its center, has a cluster of princess cut diamonds. This cluster is graced on each side by two more prominent diamonds. These three clusters symbolize the past, the present, and the future – the present being the largest of the clusters and thus reminding us to treasure the moment we are engaged in presently. The rest of the band curves flowingly through the center, almost as if emulating the infinity symbol. The band is lined with small diamonds, which sparkle so beautifully in the sunlight. I still vividly remember the first time I ever saw that ring. Logan was down on one knee in his parents’ back yard (in the middle of the black hills of South Dakota…talk about stunning scenery!) holding a beautiful wooden ring box open in his hands. It was a perfect fall day, and I remember the way those diamonds absolutely sparkled in the sunlight. I was sure I had never seen a more beautiful ring.
That beautiful engagement band is hugged gently by a wedding band, equally adorned with diamonds and gracefully complimenting the symbolism of the engagement ring. These two beautiful rings…not a set…yet so perfect for each other. So perfect it’s as if they were meant to be together. I remember going to shop for wedding bands together with Logan. And, I remember Logan giving me that ring on our wedding day – excitedly, nervously, and confidently placing it on my finger – only to find out after the ceremony that he had put it on backward!
This ring – two beautiful bands fused together – has graced my left hand for two years now…for two crazy, adventure-filled years! But, just recently we added one last band to my ring. Now, from what I know, it isn’t uncommon for a husband to give his wife an anniversary band on a significant anniversary such as ten or twenty years. However, we aren’t even close to celebrating one of those big milestones, so you’re probably wondering…Why another band? You’ve only been married for two years. It’s not as if you’ve got a 10-year anniversary to celebrate. No, we haven’t reached a significant marriage anniversary. We have something else to celebrate. Something we have worked long and hard on for the last two years.
This band – this is my debt free band. That’s right, DEBT FREE!!!!!! (I still can’t stop smiling.)
This debt free band symbolizes a journey we began when we got married…a journey to pay off all our debt. We wanted a life with no credit cards, no car payments, no student loans, (and eventually…no mortgage). NO DEBT. (Yes, I know we are weird!)
This debt free band represents so many things. It symbolizes countless jobs worked diligently by Logan. (There were many weeks when he worked all day and all night – over and over and over.) It represents garage sales, hours upon hours of crafting goods to sell, and way too many nights spent apart from my husband. It represents a lifestyle rich with self-control – a lifestyle where my grocery budget was a puzzle, eating out was not at all an option, and a new pair of jeans was a gift from friends. This band represents some of the first goals we ever set as a couple. It represents the highs and lows in our journey towards achieving those goals. It represents some great financial successes and some even greater lessons in money and wise spending. This debt free band represents teamwork, dedication, hard work, and sacrifice.
Towards the end of our debt free journey…say the last $10,000 or so…we got really, as Dave Ramsey would say, ‘gazelle intense.’ We were sick and tired of being in debt. We wanted nothing more than to be done; and we were willing to do about anything to get there. Logan was working around the clock; and I was managing the home front, and our two little girls, on my own most days. Even though we were focused, this is when it got really hard for me. You see, I married into most of this debt. None of it was originally my debt. The credit cards, furniture payments, and student loans were all Logan’s. Don’t get me wrong…we did create some debt together when we didn’t have enough saved for the hospital bills for our first child or when we learned our lesson about contractors and electrical work. But, most of the debt was his…and that was really starting to grind on me. I was sick of sacrificing for something that wasn’t mine.
You see, during this ‘gazelle intense’ time, I was in the fourth trimester after having our second child (who we cash flowed of course!). I was recovering postpartum, and not really fitting comfortably into many of my clothes. At this point, I had two pairs of jeans to my name…both of which I had owned since my early college years. I had recently popped the buttons on both pairs of jeans because they were so worn out. Embarrassingly enough, my only two pairs of jeans were being held together with hair ties. Yes, hair ties! But, I was stubborn. I was determined that we were not going to budget money for new clothes. The jeans would have to do until we were debt free. (Of course, God is good and I was blessed by a few friends, which resulted in a couple pair of new jeans prior to the finale of our debt journey.)
But, back to my story…the story of a tired mom of two little girls who is sick of sacrificing because this debt wasn’t hers. Wait. What?!? Can we just stop and think about what I was feeling? I was sick of sacrificing a couple years of our lives – two years of hard work and time away from my husband in order to have the rest of our lives debt free?!? I was sick of sacrificing two measly years in order to give my daughters a better life and spend the rest of our lives giving generously?!? How incredibly selfish of me.
In the midst of this internal battle, I was humbled (ok, embarrassed, actually…) realizing that my sacrifice was so minuscule in comparison to the sacrifice that Jesus gave to us all when He died on the cross…died for sins that WERE NOT HIS. My sacrifice was minuscule in comparison to the sacrifice that God made when He gave His son to die for our sins. If God can give His son to save us…if Jesus can give His life for me and you…surely I can give two measly years!
And so, two years and $97,000 later, we have completed our debt free journey…and I have a few more diamonds that will forever be on my left hand to remind me of this journey. They will remind me of how my husband took charge of our scary finances and inspired this journey for both of us. They will remind me of the importance of that open line of communication about money between Logan and me…and the importance of continuing this communication in order to invest in our relationship. They will remind me to always treasure what we have been given because it is truly a gift from God; and He calls us to be good stewards of His gifts. My diamonds will remind me of tears, laughter, sweat, love, and joy. My diamonds will always have a story to tell – the story of a debt free journey that has forever changed our family and our legacy.